Growing Up Mormon - Fast Sunday

Let me tell you what Fast Sunday is all about in the Mormon world.  It was the one weekend a month that I hated more than any other, it was dread, it was the pain and suffering that can only come from the directives of a vengeful God.

My father never did anything halfway when it came to adhering to the principles and precepts of the gospel until after I had moved out of his house.  I hear he softened a bit for the younger kids but I'm not in touch with them enough to know if this is true.  However back in the day, when it came to Fast Sunday there was no softness in the old man. 

We were always busy doing this or that for the church on Saturdays.  Sometimes it was helping people move – Mormons move more than any other group of people on earth: excepting perhaps Gypsies and Mongolian Herdsmen.  Sometimes our Saturdays were spent working at the Ward's welfare farm or in the Stake cannery where the food storage items are prepared.  Sometimes it was Home Teaching – which is where a pair of Mormon men (the pair must have an adult, but sometimes the junior companion can be as young as 12) visit four to six families in the ward and teach them a lesson about the gospel, offer to help them an (usually with moving I discovered) and generally see how they're doing. 

After a full Saturday working for the Lord, we'd go home and eat dinner.  My father would bless the food and dedicate the fast.  Then it was on . . .

No food or drink, not even water for the rest of the night.  In the morning – nothing.  We were fasting. We'd awake, get ready for church and go.  If we were caught going toward the water fountain at church it was a whipping later for disrespecting the Lord.  All through church, hungry.

Church consists of Sacrament Meeting which is the main meeting of the church, in the chapel with everyone in attendance, followed by Sunday School which is then followed by Priesthood Meeting (for the men, of course). 

On Fast Sundays the Sacrament Meeting is renamed Fast and Testimony Meeting and for some reason, missionaries love to bring their marks (investigators) to church during Testimony meeting. 

It begins with a hymn and a prayer, then announcements by the Bishop or one of this counselors, then the sacrament is passed out by teenage priesthood holders.  Sacrament is one tiny, torn piece of Wonder bread (no larger than a bird's crumb) and a condiment cup of water – this is the blood and body of Christ – he's Wonder Bread and tap water in case you were curious.  Then the real part of the meeting begins.  All these hungry people stand up from the congregation, one by one, and tell the rest of the members how much they believe in the church, in Joseph Smith, in the current prophet, and the Gospel.  Then they usually recount some personal experience where the Spirit, or Holy Ghost, has given them guidance and helped them overcome some obstacle that Satan placed in tier path.  This is a prime indication that the church is true. Usually that spirit guides them in something stupid, like finding their keys when they were late for a church meeting and really felt desperate to find the keys so they prayed and Viola – keys.  That spirit is an amazing thing.  My key hook beside the back door isn't shit compared to the Spirit. 

I was great at Fast and Testimony meeting, I have to say.  I could tell a key-finding story with the best of them.  I'd get up and deliver a roaring tale that would leave half the congregation in tears – the other half was too far gone with hunger and fatigue to notice if Christ himself were crawling around under the pews looking for his own keys. 

We'd go to the other meetings and then we'd stand around the foyer and while my dad talked – and talked – and talked – and talked with anyone who has ears.  The man could talk about anything with anyone and it was all to keep us from eating. 

Well, I was cranky from lack of food and on the way home I'd whine.  This would start the yelling and the fighting would ensue.  When everyone was good and angry, we'd arrive home and dinner would start. 

Start, I said.  We couldn't sit down to it until at least 24 hours had passed from the last time we'd eaten anything except the Christ Almighty, who is Wonder Bread and tap water, of course. 

I always had a headache by then.  I felt miserable. 

Then we'd dig in – after an interminable prayer lasting several long minutes which seemed like hours. 

We'd dig in, and eat while my father explained in great detail how he was disappointed that we weren't using Fast Sunday to become closer to the Lord instead of complaining about hunger. 

- rick, going to have a sammich now.

Comments

[a rose is a rose]

what does fasting have to do with god or with joseph smith or with salvation?

i have friends who are (still) practicing catholics. when lent comes and they give something up, i just want to bitch slap them. i wonder if they even KNOW why they're giving something up (other than it's sort of required).

i don't have issues with people believing in god (i really don't. i think most people NEED to believe in god because they're too afraid NOT to).

i DO have issues with people making up all sorts of EXTRA stuff they think their god likes them to do or not to do.

[Calamity Jane]

Oh God, I don't know how many times my sweet, scatterbrained mother made us pray with her to find her keys.

I never did Fast Sunday. My parents "strongly encouraged" it, but didn't force it, I think because I was such a skinny girl that everyone thought I was anorexic, and they were afraid I would tell people that they starved me.

[Success Warrior]

Rose, by denying the body, a person is brought closer to the Lord. Probably because they spend so much time praying for food. "Dead god, please let me eat."

God was watching out for me. My mom gets terrible migraine headaches if she goes too long without food so we just paid our fasting fee and went on with our life.

[C. L. Hanson]

"the other half was too far gone with hunger and fatigue to notice if Christ himself were crawling around under the pews looking for his own keys."

ROTFL, OK this line nearly led to one of those beer-spewed-on-computer-screen incidents. You see, It's not quite fast Sunday at my house. ;)

Here's the happiest type of Fast Sunday growing up Mormon.

[a rose is a rose]

your god doesn't get pissed when you bother him for stupid shite like finding keys?

hell s w, we only had to not eat meat on fridays and not eat at all prior to receiving communion. that wasn't bad if you went to EARLY sunday mass. i do believe that's changed now though.

isn't it funny how god wants us to celebrate him with all of these DIFFERENT rituals.

we all had THE one true god too!

[The Angry Young Man]

Huh. I think now I understand why my old housemate (a former, picture perfect Mormon until he gave into the gay) was so eager to help me move. He flew up to Seattle, at his own expense, and helped me pack up the van and move my crap down to SF. I was amazed by this display of generosity and kindness. Now I see it was just some sorta kneejerk, involuntary response left over from his days as a choir boy at the tabernacle or whatever. Unbelievable!

[Reg]

Well let's see here, on page 87 of the "Mind Control Manual" it clearly states that establishing a recurring bout of bodily weakness due to induced hunger, infirmity, and/or pain will bring about susceptability to belief in whatever you are told. Fasting is a form of religious water-boarding.

[CV Rick]

As Reg pointed out, fasting does make one susceptible.

I'd like to point out that early in the Mormon Church History, at the dedication of the Navou, Illinois Temple, Joseph Smith made all the men fast for days and then got them blitzed on wine - yes, alcohol and a lot of it - but he blessed it so that it wouldn't get them 'drunk' or so he claimed.

Then he claimed visions and said things like, "Did you feel that? Did you see that? That was the spirit of the Lord." After the dedication he had a lot of extra witnesses to divinity.

Krista, keep with the cult all you want . . . defend them with apologetics, but nothing of what I speak can't be verified with a little research.

[Sugar]

A Buddhist might certainly use the act of fasting in some manner as part of their practice, but their practice is not forced upon them by anyone god or man or representative of a god. The practice for a Buddhist is one that is desired by the Buddhist, controlled by the Buddhist and with the goal of "Mindfulness" and understanding the nature of impermanence and reaching a higher plane of existence.
The Buddhist practice of fasting is NEVER to find lost keys and NEVER to talk about lost keys in large groups of other hungry seekers.