My Boy Scout Summer

Have you ever met someone whose name defined them? Norman Lee Warden the Third was one of those people. I was friends with his little brother, John, who was a fine basketball player.  John was a normal boy, brown hair with freckles, athletic with a really good sense of humor.  He was only a year younger than Norman and to this day I have no idea why they were so different.

When I met Norman I made the mistake of calling him Norm.  “I am Norman Lee Warden the Third,” he said. “My father is a Norman Lee Warden and my grandfather is a Norman Lee Warden.” John rolled his eyes.

Norman had an acne problem which left his face pitted and splotchy and he wore thick, black framed glasses. Unfortunately for him, John was bigger, stronger, and better looking and never hesitated to pound on Norman whenever they disagreed. Without an escape route, few boys reminded John that he wasn't an only child. John stayed in a different cabin, hung out with different boys, and never took any lessons with Norman.  Until swim safety.

Swim safety was part of a merit badge requirement and it involved demonstrating swimming skills as well as learning rescue techniques.  Of all the classes offered, it was the most difficult and the most in demand because scout camp was really the only opportunity all year to get those requirements certified. In my Boy Scout Summer, I was assisting the adult instructor and despite my warning, he ran down the list of kids and assigned everyone a partner based on where they fit alphabetically.  John Warden and his brother Norman Lee Warden the Third teamed up to learn rescue techniques.  You should have have seen the crowd that assembled for that lesson.  Adult Instructor thought that it was all about him doing such a good job.

The trouble started on the dock where the brothers argued, fought, and Norman actually pushed John off the dock to the “oohs” of the crowd.  John climbed back onto the dock with venom in his eyes. 

After swimming skills demonstration, the teams were set out to achieve certification.  One pair after another would pretend rescues and practice the one arm side stroke, bringing the other partner to shore as if he'd been nearly drowned. The Warden brothers were the last pair, coming as they were at the end of the alphabet.

John swam out and Norman followed. Adult Instructor cupped his hands at his mouth and shouted, “Now John, I want you to rescue Norm.”

Norman Lee Warden the Third screamed back, “I'm Norman Lee . . .” and was pushed under the water in mid sentence as John attempted to grab him.  Norman came to the surface sputtering and mad, screaming at his brother about the treatment. 

At this point, a wise man would have calmed the situation somehow, but as the jubilant crowd on the shore knew, Adult Instructor wasn't going to be promoted to Oracle anytime soon.  He saw the crowd as a fan club and the situation as an opportunity to expand a Cult of Personality.  Playing it up, he screamed out to Norman, “That's great.  Many drowning victims struggle wildly and the rescuer must subdue them.  Thrash about.”

I don't think Norman heard him, because he was trying to get at John, but John was the better swimmer, so he just stayed away.  Adult Instructor yelled at him, “You have to save this man.”

“How?  He's crazy,” John yelled back.

“Hit him,” Adult Instructor sagely commanded, turning to cheers of the crowd. 

“Hit him?”  John was really asking here.  I think he wanted to just come to shore and not go through with it.

“Hit him,” Adult Instructor repeated.  The crowd of ravenous boys started the chant, “Hit him, Hit him, Hit him.”  Boys want chaos, and the mob fed on it.

John shrugged, and moved in for the kill.  He circled Norman who was really out of control by this point and then threw himself forward with two strong strokes.  All of a sudden he was in Norman's face and I saw his fist come out of the water.  This wasn't just going to be a subduing blow.

When John's fist landed, everything went quiet. Norman immediately stopped thrashing and all the boys stood along the shore with their mouths open.  Adult Instructor turned back to the action as if in slow motion to see Norman Lee Warden the Third sink below the surface. John had hit him with everything he had, knocking his older brother out cold.  Then he'd turned to the dock with a classic, 'Now What?' look on his face. Adult Instructor's jaw dropped and he stopped functioning. 

I leapt into the water and swam to Norman, bringing him up and dragging him to the shore.  John swam beside me. And Adult Instructor witnessed a real-life rescue for the first time in his life.

The good news is that Norman was fine. He got an ambulance ride to Idaho Falls, the nearest large town, and his parents picked him up there and he didn't return to camp that summer.  John was an instant hero, having knocked his brother out with a single hit in front of the whole camp and with the permission of a camp counselor. 

From somewhere, Adult Instructor produced a bottle of whiskey and drank enough that night, despite camp rules, to render himself as unconscious as Norman Lee Warden the Third had been just a few hours earlier.

And me?  I knew that this was going to be a Boy Scout Summer to remember.

- CV Rick

Next episode:  Why it's a bad idea to separate the Boy Scout Camp and the Girl Scout Camp  with only a lake.

Comments

[mark]

you know the old joke about how a cub scout becomes a boy scout....

[Success Warrior]

One year at scout camp, probably the year before I met Rick, I was on a hike with Norman and the rest of the scouts. We were climbing this steep hill starting into an all day hike.

The clouds overhead were racing by. This wasn't a slow lazy passage of summer clouds. For some reason, they were in a hurry to get across the sky. They were zipping by with enough speed to attract the attention of all of us.

Norman was especially intrigued and decided to take a picture of the clouds to remember how fast they were going.

After he took the picture, a still photograph of the fastest clouds ever, I just stared at him as he continued his climb. I shook my head and started my climb.

I had forgotten the day until this post. Maybe I should have taken a picture.

[CV Rick]

I never knew about the photograph. I hope he still has it.

It must've been hard to be obnoxious, nerdy, AND stupid.

[Success Warrior]

Our timing was such that we never did go to camp together. You moved in the summer I went and I moved out the next summer.

[a rose is a rose]

i'm wicked jealous

success warrior KNOWS norman and i don't!

[CV Rick]

The funny thing is that I searched Norman's true name on the Internet and nothing came up. There's no way that anyone who met Norman would forget him.

[mark]

maybe Norm is now hiding in an undisclosed location with a buddy?!?!?

[Sister Mary Lisa]

Rick, I love your stories. I really do. I can't wait to get back to reading today's continuation of this story. Riveting.